Remove any negative or disrespectful photos. Delete posts that are disrespectful or inflammatory. Post a profile picture that accurately represents your personality . Use a unique greeting. Using a unique greeting will ensure that you will be memorable to the girl you are talking to.
Instead of the mundane greeting that won't make you stand out, try one of these openers : Ask open ended questions. Now that you've started a dialogue, it's time to keep the conversation going.
Avoid yes or no questions. Open ended questions specific to her, will encourage her to become engaged in the conversation. Find shared interests through online profiles and expand your conversation around common ground. Only send one message at a time. Avoid seeming spammy by limiting your responses to one message for each one received.
This is a way to encourage the conversation to move forward so that she wants to keep talking to you. Give her a compliment focused on part of the conversation or her personality. It is OK to have some fun with your conversation and show your sense of humor. Avoid complimenting physical appearances at this point. Use the information you have learned as the conversation develops to build the base of a fun relationship.
Keep the conversation focused on her. Find common interests that you can relate to and share personal experiences. Do not dominate the conversation by making it about you, but keep her involved by showing you are interested in the same things she is. Be gracious and leave her wanting more. Express your happiness that you had the opportunity to talk with her.
Let her know that you want to talk again by casually creating the opportunity to talk again. Try these lines and you can create an opening: I hope we can talk again soon!
What's your email address? Open up deeper conversations through email. You can create a stronger relationship by sharing personal stories or events from your life.
Make a connection last by showing her who you are and being honest about your past. Comment on current posts and pictures on social media accounts. Keep her thinking about you by keeping up with what she's doing on social media and engage in conversations through comments and likes. Be patient waiting for a reply. Remember that she has a life too, and don't expect an instant reply to every email.
It may take her a few days to respond to your emails, so be patient and let her respond before you send multiple emails. Ask her out and meet in person. Once you have exchanged four or five emails, it's time to bring the relationship into the real world.
You're both here to date, so eventually you need to move things offline. Once the two of you have exchanged enough banter to feel comfortable, Amour says it's time to set up a place and time to meet. If you are, then after a few days of messaging, make your move.
It's only one date, after all! See where it goes. Spelling errors send the message that you're not putting a lot of thought into the messages you're sending — especially where names are concerned.
Worse, they could mean you're not very intelligent or well educated. Turn It Into an Interview. Asking questions to get to know your match a bit better shows that you're interested, but Bennett cautions to steer clear of making your conversation become too mundane. Nobody connects romantically like that!
Even things like "Hey sexy," "Hi beautiful," or "Daaaaang" make warning lights go off that you're not looking to date. Here's an example of when paying attention to the details works. In our example, our dater Colin matches with a podiatrist who loves the outdoors, and breaks the ice with a cute opener.
His first message shows that he read her profile. His initial message is also authentic, and showcases his personality. He's also taking an interest in what she's doing and what her hobbies are, but doesn't belabor the conversation for too long before asking her out. Plus, his responses are prompt, which keeps her interested and gets to the point quickly, allowing him to get to know her weekend plans and get a date set up in just a few message exchanges. In this next example, Julia gets a message about "A Goofy Movie," which she lists on her Tinder profile as her favorite movie from childhood.
Her match, "Kevin," runs with it, making a confession about how he reacted to one of the movie's spinoffs.
Finding common ground will always help your cause when messaging girls on Tinder — especially if you can get a laugh out of it. Plus, once they do meet up, these two already have an inside joke going between them, and can spend their first date coming up with a "formal protest" about the unfair ratings for one of their favorite childhood movies. That's the kind of first date story you tell your kids about someday, folks. But make sure you're not taking things too far when you're complimenting how she looks, as our friend "Scott" learned the hard way in this exchange.
In this exchange, "Scott" is complimenting the dress that Bianca is wearing in her profile picture, where she's standing in front of a local hangout where there's lots of wine bottles in the background. Which she's into, initially. Unfortunately, he takes it too far in this next message:.
The whole goal of Tinder messaging is, of course, to ask her out on a date and for her to say yes. And while you don't want to become pen pals, this message sent to Daniela was too much, too soon. Again, back to attention to detail here. Your match listed her name that way because that's what she wants to be called. So fight the urge to turn "Jennifer" into "Jen," and stick to addressing her the way that she presents herself on the app.
Your first message shouldn't be asking her out, either. We want to feel comfortable enough with you to see some of your personality and know that we'd have something in common to talk about before agreeing to meet up in real life.